Is it worth it anyway to get out of the comfort zone
“Do not leave the room, do not make a mistake,” the famous line from Joseph Brodsky’s poem clearly and vividly describes the situation when a person is both well and at the same time sick of the internal conditions created by him. Yes, it is a delusion that in a comfortable comfort zone it is always pleasant and warm, rather the opposite: you get used to it so that any change is terrifying.
In general, the comfort zone is not about whether you are good or bad, but about the fact that you don’t want to leave it. Because it is there that the state of psychological security is being formed. And even if the soul is longing, it is still its own, dear and home. And what will be beyond its borders, where it will bring, what emotions you will experience - and why even know this? For example, a person who has never been able or disliked to speak in public is unlikely to sincerely want to overcome the existing barriers (and they have definitely been formed for certain reasons) and go to public speaking courses or work with a psychologist on body clips.This also threatens with new sensations, stress, and you still have to go on the “scene”, is it? It is terrible to even think about the chain of changes, although they only appeared on the horizon. But the bottom line is that thanks to the discomfort we get development - professional, spiritual or social. Anything. After all, outside the comfort zone there is a risk, and without risk we can develop as individuals, alas, with difficulty.
When we talk about the "comfort zone", we do not mean living conditions. This is only a psychological state in the usual conditions. No one forces to give up cars, a soft bed or humidifiers. With them, as you know, it is easy to make friends and live long. But if we consider everything that concerns our soul and the conditions in which it resides, then the requirements for them are much more stringent.
Another paradox and irony: to go beyond comfort, you must first enter it. This may be a marriage, a successful career, numerous friends. That is something that you created and in which you felt confident and good. But to run immediately from the high-comfort zone is stupid - you certainly need to enjoy it enough, strengthen your position, and live some time in it.But when you feel that you have rested against the ceiling and have outgrown everything that surrounded you, then this is a real sign that changes are needed.
One may get the impression that these exits from the inhabited psychological space are necessary for everyone. Oddly enough, no. It is important to receive signals from within, and not from outside, from advisers and even psychologists. A professional psychologist will not give such advice - this is at least unethical. A person decides for himself, whether to develop him or not, to change something in his life or not; the task of the psychologist here is to help the ward to look at his life and behavior from a different angle, to guess the real causes of his problems. A deeply important decision to change the zone of personal comfort is not taken immediately and is not always easy. If there are no internal resources, then, most likely, no change and can not be followed. Moreover, people who live in harmony with themselves, appreciate stability and peace, do not even have to think that something is wrong with them. And there is another type of people, always something thirsty, seeking and something "eternally unhappy". It’s just perfect for them to leave any zones they want, which they do without end, without even knowing what they are doing, it turns out, something useful for themselves.After all, for someone happiness is the eternal search for happiness, the path, the process, otherwise it’s boring and too cozy.
Summing up, it is worth saying that change is always for the better, but do not be too categorical. And let the authors of endless motivational books advise you to “go on a new route to work”, do not do this until you see the meaning and feel a real need. Do not go on an unplanned trip, if you know that nothing but excitement will bring it to you. You will spend time only on the fact that you will convince yourself that everything is in order and that this act is for “work”. Only you understand your needs, and if not, let's learn how to hear them.
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